2nd Year Academic Writing Lesson 5 Thursday 16th
May 2013 TODAYS LESSON
DRAFT 1 is DUE TODAY
Please submit your Microsoft Word File to the TEACHERS FOLDER >> bgallagh >>
Report 2 and print a paper copy for class. The teacher
will advise you on progress and improvements.
Ø Submit your file to TEACHERS
FOLDER >> bgallagh >> 2nd Year Writing >>Report 2
Thursday Period 1
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Thursday Period 2
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12011234-W3-20-01-2
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12011234-W3-08-01-2
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Ø Simple Dictation – around 42 words “Chelsea” (15 minutes)
Ø Discussion on Essay 1. Use your Reading
for Content and Structure Worksheets from your little booklet. (15-30
minutes)
Ø Essay Format and Paragraph Format
o Opening paragraph
o Body Paragraphs
o Closing Paragraph
Ø Save your 1st draft file to
your USB and the server.
Work on improving it for your next 2nd draft.
Work on improving it for your next 2nd draft.
Ø HOMEWORK –RESEARCH MORE and
BUILD YOUR FINISHED ESSAY
Dictation May 16th Chelsea
REMOVED
FYA - Format for
Submissions remains the same
11011xxx – Mao Suzukia
June 14th, 2012
Essay 2, Draft 1.
Mr. Gallagher
“The average age of Japan's population is
increasing. What are the main problems facing Japanese society because of this?”
TODAY
PEER
REVIEW – Read Essays & Check Overall
CLOSING
PARAGRAPH – (paragraph 5)
This
final paragraph should:
Ø Restate the
thesis statement
Ø Review the
main points in different words
Ø Bring the
essay to a satisfactory end with 1 of these:
o summary
o Conclusion
o Prediction
o Evaluation
n
NB: It should NOT contain new information or quotes.
Aging Society NOTES FROM EARLIER LESSONS
Introduction
• statistics:
current and future projections • total population figures
• average age of
population
• breakdown of working population
• causes
• main problems
Cause 1: Declining
birthrate • statistics
• increase in
working women •
cost of raising children• childcare facilities and childcare leave
• increased
pressure on social welfare system
Cause 2: Increase in
longevity
• better health care and education • advances in medical science
Problem 1: Pension issues
• decreasing
working population
• increasing number of people on pensions
• decreasing
number of contributors to pension funds
Problem 2: Social
welfare issues
• increase in elderly people
• shortage of nursing homes and care workers
• nuclear family
and change in role of family vis-à-vis looking after elderly • lonely death
• migration of
younger generations from rural areas
FORMAT and ESSAY EXAMPLE
11011xxx – Mao
Suzuki
May 6th,
2013
Essay 1, Draft 1.
Mr B. Gallagher
The average age of
Japan's population is increasing. What are the main problems facing Japanese
society because of this?
The main problems facing Japanese society are problem one - blah blah blah, problem 2 blah blah blah, problem 3 blah blah blah and problem 4 blah blah blah. The central causes of these issues as explained by Oe (2006) are that “The children of the transitional generation, the post-transitional generation, have tended to delay marriage, have left home after becoming financially independent of their parents.” Another factor proposed is that s“women of this generation generally choose to maintain their working career.” (Oe, 2006). and explain, explain, explain.
Topic Sentence introduces the paragraph and gives the reader a clear idea of what the paragraph is about. I should enter a relevant quote like this “The children of the transitional
generation, the post-transitional generation, have tended
to delay marriage” (Oe, 2006) With the citation of family name and date written in parenthesis. I then Explain what this information is meaning and continue my paragraph with other ideas if required. Each idea I should introduce, insert the evidence and then explain
http://coe21-policy.sfc.keio.ac.jp/ja/wp/WP89.pdf
My reference page is a separate page from my writing
References
Oe, M. (2006) Problems and Implications of Japan's Aging Society for Future Urban Developments. Policy and Governance Working Paper Series No. 89 from “Policy Innovation Initiative: Human Security Research in Japan and Asia”, Keio University, Japan, p13. Retrieved (May 17th, 2012) from http://coe21-policy.sfc.keio.ac.jp/ja/
wp/WP89.pdf
Oe, M. (2006) Problems and Implications of Japan's Aging Society for
Future Urban Developments. Policy and Governance Working Paper Series No. 89
from “Policy Innovation Initiative: Human Security Research in Japan and Asia”,
Keio University, Japan, p13. Retrieved (May 17th, 2012) from http://coe21-policy.sfc.keio.ac.jp/ja/wp/WP89.pdf
Oe, M. (2006) Problems and Implications of Japan's Aging Society for
Future Urban Developments. Policy and Governance Working Paper Series No. 89
from “Policy Innovation Initiative: Human Security Research in Japan and Asia”,
Keio University, Japan, p13. Retrieved (May 17th, 2012) from http://coe21-policy.sfc.keio.ac.jp/ja/wp/WP89.pdf
